M&M's (Marriage and Money)

They go together like PB&J. Just like M&M's, melt in your mouth, not in your hands. Its kind of a surreal metaphor. Marriage and money, yes blend well and and can give anyone, who respects it, a life worth living. That's the "melt in your mouth" part. But to those who don't respect it... well... that's the "not in your hands" part. Those that are for having separate accounts, have the same specific reasoning for it. So I can go and spend money without having to answer for it. This is primarily because you want to feel independent. Nothing wrong with wanting to feel independent. However, that word "Independent" has a specific definition to these particular individuals in this situation. The definition is "I am a grown person that works for my paycheck and should not have to answer to anybody when I decide to buy something expensive that I want". That is perfectly understandable and they are absolutely right. However, (and understand that I am not intentionally speaking negative of anyone, nor is it my intention to single out any particular side of the house. I'm just basing facts and stating my opinion) money is one of the biggest causes for divorce these days. If we pair ourselves with the right partner, we should not have these problems. Something has changed in this society that was not so present before our time. We as a society have changed, and in some cases we have forgotten, never learned or unlearned what true love is. The two main pillars are patience and kindness. One of the top roots connected to those pillars is communication. Yes you should be able to spend your own money when you choose on whatever you choose. But when you become married, you are no longer a loner. That is why your relationship status doesn't say "SINGLE" anymore. You made a promise to yourself, GOD (whatever god you worship, and I know mine is an awesome one), and your partner that you would become one and would work together through everything, in sickness and in health, the good and the bad, forsaking all others, till death do you part. Most of us have forgotten that because we are all trying to individually get ahead before someone else uses us as a stepping stone to beat us to the top. Everybody wants to get theirs. No one wants to help anybody but themselves these days. They may be helpful by looking out for people, volunteering your time, doing spectacular things for your significant other. I'm not speaking on those actions or those specific people. Listen, my point is this... we have a divorce rating that is higher now, than it has ever been in history. Don't believe me? Well... you know how we do... Google it. The number reason for these divorces... Finances. Number two... infidelity. We as a society are ignorant when it comes to love, relationships, and marriage. Which means we need to change our way of thinking. To become one means to become one... PERIOD. "AND THE TWO SHALL UNITE AND BECOME ONE FLESH". Maybe if we change our mentality, find the right person we can mesh with (someone that doesn't mind when I spend, as long as the bills are paid), trust in each other to understand both sides and work together, then there is no reason you can't pay the bills, and purchase the things you want when you want them. Bills come first, then after your needs come your wants. That's the golden rule of finances. How about a second joint account for your rainy day money, vacation money, burn or slush money? What's the matter? scared to trust each other enough to not spend it all before you get the chance to touch it? You married the wrong person, or you have trust issues and need to see a therapist. The glory of love and marriage is the strength that builds from completing the challenges that come with it. To jump, skip, or dance around those challenges, is to say that you don't take your relationship seriously. Work together on your finances and stop taking away from you marriage. So in the end, when you respect that M&M and you put it in your mouth, let it marinate, it begins to melt. That is when you taste and then enjoy the pleasures of what it has to offer. But when your too ignorant to know what your doing, then I doubt very seriously that you would even know what to do with it once its in your hand.

The Truth B Told

"B"