Good Morning

Good Morning

As I enter into your bedroom I discover you practicing your Yoga and Pilate's. The hard work your putting into your workout, the finesse you practice, the agility you posses, the skill you employ, the strength you gain, the flexibility you administer, the patience and slow rate of pace you continuously improve upon because of your steadfast determination,  commitment, desire, motivation and inspiration that is oh so present by sweet nectar of your sweat that gracefully drains from your under your skin, out and down your body like a waterfall from the great rapids. I couldn't hold it in anymore, my breath was becoming harder and harder to catch and my knees weaker and weaker. I had to act fast as I feared I was about to perish due to an overload of pleasure and didn't want to miss my opportunity to taste you one last time... To feel your skin touch mine. So I quickly and swiftly lifted you from the Pilate's ball you were so gorgeously propped up on and rushed you to the bed. I kissed you from your belly to your head as I removed your sports bra to tie your hands. I shifted my direction and traveled my lips to your feet, detouring my tongue around your navel. I remove your pants with my fingers but your panties with my teeth, I then gently kiss, lick, tickle and nibble in those sensitive areas all the way to your feet. I tickle your foot with the hairs on my face. I look up and gaze into your eyes as you say "More Master". I simply place my fingers on your lips, whisper " shhhh", and then say "slow down baby, this ain't 50 Shades Of Gray". Smirking at your jaw dropped facial expression I choose then to insert, after your mouth widened more and your eye's finishes rolling in the back of your head, you somehow gain the strength to ask me "omg what the hell brought this on?". I replied, " Just wanted to say Good Morning dear."

The Truth B Told,
            B

Lead, Follow, Or Get The Hell Out Of The Way

New Blog: Lead, Follow or Get the hell out of the way.

Followers. So many of them, especially when it comes to fashion. But where did it all begin for fashion and who started it? Someone did. Could it have been the person who created the Dress for women? Did you know that person was a man? Yes thats right, a man created the original that inspired the dresses that women wear today? Of course the original dress was the only style at first during its time in existence. That dress looks nothing like today's dresses. Why? Someone decided to change the status. Someone felt their opinion mattered more than everyone else's, and that's what has been coined as fashion and style. But all fashion is, is an  opinion. Style is an alteration or variation of fashion. In order for the next designer to design a different dress, the original designers blueprint needed to be altered to what their desires are. It just so happened that others agreed. And so they followed. It was something new and interesting. It was intriguing. It was different. It wasn't the same ol' thing. This was good, to start. Then everyone became so obsessed over the new thing and just being that everyone was doing it. To make matters worst, society created the image believing that since its something new, then its the cool thing to do and if you don't then your a nothing and a nobody. You get no respect. Then guess what else followed? The idea makers decided to capitalize on this epic control and take it to the next level by hiring well known individuals to endorse their idea, product or style as a way of convincing society that "This is the NEW COOL thing to do". Problem though is that not everyone can afford it but everyone wants it. Everybody craves the status. So much to the point where some of us that don't have it and can't afford it, will fake like we have it, had it, are doing it or have done it when we have no experience in it at all. Take sex for instance. Yes more and more children  are having sex at a younger and younger age. However, there are a lot of these young children who will talk the talk as if they are going to have this big weekend outing or getaway, lots of drinking and sex, either with someone they know or a total stranger or both. Some pretend that this is a regular routine for them. For some it is. Point is, there are doers and there are fakers. Which one are you? Those that are fakers, I like to call them "Pretenders". They "pretend" to know "what's good", they "pretend" to have experience, they "pretend" to do it on a regular.

They "pretend" to be established, they "pretend" to have "SWAG", they pretend to be "all that", and someone you should envy or hate on. They want to feel important so they pretend to be so in the hopes that you believe whatever they say and follow them. To them, that somehow validates their status, so their ego can grow. Problem is, only they know the truth, which is that you follow a false god. Eventually they think so highly of themselves that they become judgemental and feel if you don't do or wear what they wear then your ugly and ain't shit. If they wouldn't do it then its automatically not cool, its ugly, or stupid. Most people are too scared to be individuals out of fear of not being accepted. One things for certain, if you see enough people doing it then everyone else thinks its ok. The most shameful part is... People have their individual tastes but are in such a desperate need of approval and desire to be the popular one, that they will change their clothes, style and anything about themselves that they feel they need to in order to be accepted... Accepted by the people who are not your real friends but determine whether your worthy of the title ''COOL/POPULAR''. I call those types of people ''Judges''. And we enable them to judge us every day, but yet we don't like being judged. A judge themself most certainly does not like being judged. In their eyes, they run this. You will say you hate hotdogs and join a hate rally against hotdogs and swear your all about hamburgers just to meet the judge's approval, when you and your family know you're a born hotdog/hamburger lover. In fact, you might even stop eating hotdogs all together. Is this farse behavior Really necessary? Is it really that serious that you have to alter yourself just to fit in? Ok, I get what you're saying. Hey, ''Sometimes you just gotta get in where you fit in''. Believe me, I know. I get it. But you don't. You just think you do. That doesn't mean you join the group that would.

Require you to have to give up your natural self to be a part of them. Those are the groups that always fall. Yeah They may look like the best and could have reached the top of the social ladder in every category their "Clique" could compete in, but eventually... at some point... they all fall. Don't sell your soul to the devil. Another example is this continuous and ever spreading desire for the infamous "MAC sauce". Seriously people, is it that good to you or are you going with the program because that's what everyone else is doing? If P Diddy and Lil Wayne protested against it, whether its for some legitimate reason or not (like health concerns) would you still get it? Or the whole wearing your ballcap with the bill straight instead bending it. A very talented and much respected rapper Fabolous is the one who started it and apparently it was a New York thing. When I was in the military, I had this discussion with a fellow service member and he tells me that he has always worn his hats like that? Really? So when everyone else was folding their hat bills, you were the one child who wore it straight? Bet you got laugh at a lot. I continued to tell him by my observation he just followed everyone else. If it was to go out of style would you still do it? He said yes again and added that its his style, like he created it. Seriously? Please, spare me your ignorant shenanigans. I had to at least attempt to give him the benefit of the doubt for one reason. When I was little, my parents dressed me in the cheapest clothes they could buy. I was constantly laughed at and made fun of because I didn't wear what everyone else did. I wasn't wearing what was in style... As if I had a choice. Guess what, those very same clothes that were out of style and a cheap price when I was young, are now the latest style and expensive. So I guess I too could say I started a new trend and was in style when no one else was because I was the first one rockin what.

Would later be one of the honest and business casual styles today... Even for prepsters. And no they weren't plaid bottoms, hooker (or as I call them, fuck me boots), or sweater vests. However, if that's what you're thinking, your on the right track. Although I understand how it's possible to wear something when it's out of style and when you switch up it later becomes the one thing that's trending, I will say about my fellow service member wearing his hat a certain way since he was young, a little harder to believe? Lastly is this issue with "boys" (because that's just they are to me when they commit such a stupid fashion crimes) wearing your pants down below your derrière. We've heard and probably repeated the comments like "You know that style came from prison and why", or "how you gonna run from the cops if you can't keep your pants up". This is getting so serious that "Hot-Lanta" had to make it law to stop the fellas from sagging their pants. Even PG County Maryland now has a "Stop Sagging" or "Pull up your pants" campaign asking for people to donate there slightly used belts to help end the pants sagging syndrome these "boys" seem to be suffering from. Wow, its a shame that its that serious that we have to start a campaign as if we are helping the homeless. More and more people are speaking out on it. But it's not catching with the followers, only the leaders. But I bet you they'll listen if Lil Wayne started doing it. Hmmm. To the "boys" (and the women who are attracted to it or just put up with it) its called "SWAG". I got news for you people that buy into this and repeat it. It's not called "SWAG", it's called nonsense. Besides, "SWAG" is for "boys", and "CLASS" is for Men. Do you remember the movie "Love Don't Cost A Thing"? If you haven't seen it yet, then you really should. Either way, isn't it funny how the boy who was the geek, the outcast, refused to follow anybody, and just did his own thing and was made fun of for all of those reasons, was the same boy that ended up popular and had those very same people that made fun of him, following him doing whatever he did... Especially when he was doing something original.

All of a sudden he was the leader, so anything he did was automatically "cool" and instantly the "trending" thing to do. Hell the term "Trending" is trending now. Even the tough guys and jocks were little puppies following him around and would never dare cross him or they would've been slain and lost any level of status they had. When your status is on the line, you'll be fearful of anyone who can take it. People it is time we stop following and start leading. But you first have to learn before you can lead so that when you do lead, you lead for the right reasons. It's not about who you lead it's about what you lead them towards. If your gonna follow then that's fine, just make sure it's a worthy cause.

Eating out for lunch,  why does everything that's bad for me feel so good, I challenge you to be different, be bold, be unique, be inspiring, be role model... Be a leader and not a follower. Do something worth while in your life. Just lead follow or get the hell out of the way.

The Truth B Told,

              B

WE RUN THIS... NOT you

Ok, I have to say something about this one, because this is too much. Lil Wayne is going out of control. I don’t know, either his money is getting to his head, or his ego has expanded too much because of his fortune, his fame, his intelligence, and his status. Regardless it doesn’t give you the right to just bash a city because of your stupid mistakes that ultimately cost you jail time. For those of you that have yet to know exactly what I’m talking about, I am referring to the report that was made today on hiphopwired.com (http://hiphopwired.com/2012/08/22/new-york-officials-demand-public-apology-from-lil-wayne-for-insulting-city/)  about Lil Wayne’s alleged statement “I flat out don’t like New York”. Really Wayne?! Now don’t get me wrong, everyone is entitled to their opinions, and wouldn’t dream of bashing anyone because they don’t like a particular city, but at least have some class. Don’t publically bash a city that is the birthplace of what you represent, and most certainly don’t do it because your mad one person. Now I know the saying “One rotten apple can spoil the whole batch”, but this is not the case, nor is this phrase fitting for this specific portion of my discussion. Though it is for another part. You don’t punish the village for one farmer’s bad crop. What am I referring to here? Supposedly, Lil Wayne has had some recent gun charges in New York, and had to serve some jail time. Your problem Lil Wayne, not ours. Your fault, not mine. You were the one to make the stupid decision that caused you to become discovered by the police for having unregistered weapons in your possession. The laws are there for a reason. No, they don’t all make sense, a lot of them are stupid, old and outdated, but never the less we still have to follow them. If we choose not to, then we can only blame ourselves for the consequences we have to face for violating them and getting caught. The only reason your mad is because you got caught. The next city you get caught in for the same crime (because we all know you’ll do it again and try harder not to get caught) will give you a harsher punishment because of your previous offense, which everyone knows about (even the police) because you’re a celebrity, and so everything you do get’s blogged, facebooked, tweeted, and practically published by any other means of media disbursement. Will you publically make it know that you hate that city, or state as well? Keep it up and you will lose all of your fans. Now don’t get me wrong here, I love Lil Wayne’s music. He is one of my favorites. That doesn’t mean I did, do, or will condone any of his asinine behavior. If he keeps it up, he will lose me as a fan. Now that may not matter to him, because to him, I’m nobody. However, without fans like me, he’s nothing. If he loses all of his fans, he can’t perform, so he loses money, he get’s even madder, states more obscene comments, disgusts more people, loses more business, his label goes bankrupt… you get the point. Those that choose to stay loyal will feed off of his every word and will begin to follow anything he says, which can be very dangerous. This is the part where the saying, “One bad apple can spoil the whole bunch” comes into play. Think before you act people. Just because your famous and have earned a lot of money, and made gained a status does not mean that you are unstoppable, untouchable, or invincible. You most certainly are not above the law, and the only reason you got to where you are is because so producer that you would be a hit to the public and happened to be right. Because we liked your music, we bought your CD’s, and paid the money for ticket’s to attend your concerts. This is how you get paid. You’re not number one like you think you are. Your number one if and when we say you are. You get paid by the record label the amount that was agreed on between you, your manager, and the record label. Even if you own your label, you still have to pay bills, and your staff. But first you have to get paid. You get paid by us. We get paid by someone else, who get’s paid by someone else, etc; etc; etc. It’s a never ending circle, that we perpetuate so that yu are the end recipient of the money that we all earn, so you can live in your fancy houses, and drive your expensive cars, and so on. So you see, no matter how high you are, you still gotta answer to someone. And you answer to us. Don’t piss us off or we shall take back what we gave you… which is everything. Just look at all the “One Hit Wonders” out there, and the failed artists that no one cares to listen to anymore, no matter how many times they try to make a comeback. We Run This... Not You... the people do. Without us… your nothing.

The Truth B Told,

              B

Its 2012

So because its 2012, then that means respect and chivalry towards women is out the window? Stop saying its 2012 as an excuse to change for anything but the better. What’s happened in yesterday’s world of courtesy, patience, respect and kindness; that caused society to change to today’s world where we get so rude, deaf, dumb and stupid? Please is gone, thank you is headed out the door, sir or ma’am is a thing of the past (unless you’re in the military, or are considered a mere mortaled peasant in a job where your boss feels so superior that they demand that type of respect). People are such savages now a day’s.

I was driving one day and a man cuts me off on the highway. No turn signal, just slowly creeps over into my lane. As I honk my horn at him, he continues to nudge his way in front of me anyway because his lane wasn’t moving fast enough for him, and if he stayed in his lane, then he would’ve had to stop. So I finally decide to back down and be smarter than him, so that I could avoid an accident and prevent one from occurring around any other vehicles near me at the time. And you would think the guy would have the common decent courtesy and respect (after he already disrespected me) to signal a thank you. No… I get… the finger… like I just screwed up his vibe. So of course at this point I’m asking myself the same question from when he first tried to come over into my lane and I honked… Is he deaf or just disrespectful?

People, when we live in a world where the women not only carry, but also open and hold the umbrella, the entire time, for the man, the whole time… Houston we have a problem here. Yes, I am so serious. I was at a nail salon and spa called Sassy’s in DC and as I was leaving I saw a couple walking towards me. The woman was holding the umbrella for both her and her man while walking in the rain. Even worse, he was taking up most of the space underneath the umbrella. Now I admit, yes customs and courtesies between a couple should be shared, however, it is customary, and traditional that chivalry be given to women as it was, back in the day.

Enough is enough ladies and gentlemen! There does come a time when a change needs to be made. As we move further in life and even further into the future, change occurs. Change, is imminent, because change is needed. This of which I speak of today is not one of them. Well, it does need to change, but only backwards to revert back to the way it was, as it should never have changed in the first place. Men, it is necessary to treat the women of today with the utmost respect and love. It isn’t a hard thing to do, and it is not a lot to ask. I know it may seem like a big risk, as some women can really demand too much and take advantage of your kindness to benefit herself by expanding her ego (another blog, another time), but love is a risk, and if you want to fall in love and ultimately become happy, then it’s a risk that you’re going to have to take. Regardless, you should always continue to be patient, kind, loving, respectful, and follow the true traditions of love and relationships, like chivalry.

The Truth B Told,

              B 

The Girl From The Other Night

Its 8:00 and I’m assisting the owner with opening the bar up. I am a bouncer, so I have to be there before everyone else. Everybody envies me because in my job I get to see and greet a lot of different women. The women actually come to me to flirt, or engage in normal conversation. Usually the first thing they always ask is “Why do you always look so serious?” or “Don’t you ever smile?” It’s a job to me. I mean don’t get me wrong, it’s a fun job. I love my line of work, but I also take my job very seriously, and normally don’t make it a habit to mix business with pleasure… normally.

Well that all changed in one night. Everything was the same as usual. The DJ is playing the latest, the bartenders are pouring shots, and the owner is running the show. The promoter is making his rounds, thanking everybody for coming out that night. I’m standing at the door checking ID’s when I check one that I recognized. I recognized it because I had seen it before. It was a woman whose face looked very familiar, but I couldn’t remember who she was, when I saw her last, or why the picture on her ID is even striking my brain like a Tibetan man striking a gong. I just couldn’t figure it out. So I brushed it off and let her in. She looked up at me without moving her head, held out her hand and said “Well are you going to help me up the stairs?” I replied “Yes ma’am”. After she got to the top step, she said “Thank you”. Of course as the gentlemen that I am, I told her she was welcome. As she started to walk away, she turned and said to me “I didn’t think your gentlemen like nature was only temporary”. “Temporary?” I asked. “Yes, I didn’t have to ask last time”. I wasn’t sure that I understood her clearly, so I had to ask her, “Have we met? Do I know you?” She then in turn replied “Why yes we have. You don’t remember me? I’m the girl from the other night”. Then she walked away as her eyes patrolled my body up and down checking me out like Lioness stalking its prey. I couldn’t remember, so I tried to brush it off and concentrate on my job but it just kept popping into my head. I tried so hard but I couldn’t remember a thing. I could tell my mind was blocking something, because I would have vague images of this very same woman pop into my head, but I couldn’t make out anything. It was a strange mystery, like in some weird sex novel or something.

The door was covered and no one was coming in at that time so I decided to walk through the club to make sure nothing unusual was happening. As I walked through the dance floor, I notice “the girl from the other night” was out there dancing. She looked so beautiful. She danced as if she was putting on a private show and making love to anyone who was watching. Her bedroom eyes, luscious lips, sexy thighs and powerful hips. She had a body that was carved by God and forged by the devil. If I were to give her body a nickname I would call it The Funeral, because everybody she walks by falls over and dies. When you look back down the street, you see dead bodies for blocks. As I passed by her and her hair was whipping in the air, I caught a whiff of her perfume. Her scent was so toxic, it left me dizzy and paralyzed to the point I almost fell to my knees. Instantly I traveled on a rollercoaster ride that exploded with all of these wild thoughts, and visions of what seemed like an immense night of extreme lust, and passion between us that got so out of control that when it was over we hardly catch our breath. We were both lucky. I was lucky I didn’t pass out, and have to go to the hospital, because she damn near killed me. She was lucky that the neighbors didn’t call the police on her for a noise violation. But hey, I can say if it were true, the neighbors know my name… but I still don’t know hers. She is still the girl from the other night. And I’m not even sure all of that actually happened. Yes I had a vision, which was an upgrade from the blocked memory that I was having, and now it seems that things are starting to come together. However, it doesn’t mean that it really happened. I mean, if it did, I’m pretty sure I would remember that. That vision felt like it was so real, and it seemed like it didn’t end for days. I was so confused.

I needed some air for a minute or two. So I stepped outside to smoke. Not two minutes and guess who comes outside right behind me and asks for a light? “The girl from the other night”. Then she said, “I see your smoking habit wasn’t temporary either”. I just couldn’t understand what she meant when she kept saying temporary. So of course you know I had to ask. “How do we know each other again?” Again she replied I’m “the girl from the other night”. I know this is some kind of a game to her and she must want me to play along. I’m not one for these games when I’m trying to seriously get some answers here, but she really wasn’t leaving me much choice, so I played along. I asked her “What do mean when you say temporary?” She’s says,”Usually guys put on a front to make themselves appear to be what they really aren’t, but I could tell that with you it wasn’t a show.” “With me, when?” She replies, “The other night. You don’t remember?” I scratch my beard and reply “No, I don’t, that’s what I’m trying to figure out because I don’t see how I could have ever had any kind of night with someone as gorgeous as you and not even remember it.” She puts out her cigarette, and walks towards me. With her right hand on my chest, and her left hand running her fingers through my hair and down to my neck. With her right she caresses my face, and rubs my beard. She looks deep into my eyes with so much passion. It was like she was trying to put me in a trance. She then leans in and kisses me.

Now I know what happened. At first I tried to pull away because I barely knew this woman, but I suddenly started to remember what happened the other night as it replayed in my mind. So I couldn’t let go, because after being lost and confused the whole night, I just had to know. Then it was also a bonus that she tastes so good. She was wearing a scented pink lip gloss that was also flavored. It tastes like cotton candy. A kiss as sweet as this makes it hard to let go, and walk away.

As the visions flowed through my mind, I could see everything so clearly as if it were happening right then. We were in a hotel sweet. I am standing on the balcony, still in uniform, overlooking the city. I suddenly feel hands running along the skin of my vest from my stomach to my chest. Buttons being undone and the vest unzipped and pulled off my shoulders. She turns me around to see it’s her. She gazes into my eyes, again she tries to hypnotize. I through my vest onto the balcony chair. We make eye contact once more as she unzips my sweater and removes it herself throwing it onto the balcony ledge. I thought it was an odd place to throw my sweater but I was too caught up in the moment to care. She then turns my face back to look at her, pulls me close and kisses me. She then said to me, “Now I beseech you take me, or your pants go OVER the ledge.” Taking her seriously, and out of the concern of losing my pants in a different way other than what I had intended for, I complied.

Picking her up, she wraps her feet around my waist. We lock eyes as I carry her to the bed, and lay her in it. She takes things up a notch and start yanking the rest of my clothes off. She sighs in despair and says, “How much shit do you have on?!” I had on several shirts so I could stay warm outside and not have to wear a jacket. This made it easier to get to the police gear on my vest. She rips off my bullet proof vest I was wearing underneath. She had become so frustrated and impatient that she chose tear off the last two shirts in one movement. She threw them across the room, and as she started to lay back, popped her collar and said, “Now come get your desert… and don’t forget to eat the cherry.” We began kissing again as I took off her black blazer. Next I slowly peel away her oh so tight black stretch pants. I began kissing her body. I started with her ear, moved to her neck, and then I ran my chilling, wet, tongue from her neck all the way down her body. I pull off her sexy knee high boots one at a time. Hmmm, I love knee high boots. I call them hooker boots. I slide her pants the rest of the way off as she anxiously awaits the return of my lips to hers. As I come back up she sits up to meet me half-way. She couldn’t wait any longer. “No patience, huh?” I said to her. “Shut up,” she replied. I lift her silk red tube top up just enough to trap her arms in the air and cover most of her face, exposing only her mouth. I began to tease her by grazing her lips with mine. Barely touching her she would reach out with her lips to catch mine like a cat trying to catch a butterfly. I was driving her crazy but she enjoyed it, smiling every time she missed, but knowing it was only a matter of time before I would give in and let her catch me. She decided she had enough and let me know by wrapping her legs around me and squeezing. And so I let go before those powerful legs squeezed out all of the air I thought I owned.

She slides her arms and head out of her top and continues kissing me. We slide further onto the bed and I blindly remove her silk red thong. She then takes the thong from my hands before I could throw it, pulls it over my head and down around my neck. She wraps her hand in it and keeps it taunt so that she could control me, and I wouldn’t get away, like a jockey racing her thoroughbred. She uses her other hand to unbuckle my belt and unfasten my pants. This is where I knew “the girl from the other night” was talented when she was able to take my pants and my underwear off, in one movement, with her feet. I shit you not; it only took her two seconds. Finally, all of our clothes are off and all over the room, like in the movies. Kissing is great, but it’s time to move on with the show. I move low and slow to indulge in her sweet nectar, and oh was it so sweet. I took my time with it as she said “Make sure you eat every last drop.” I made certain of it. I even licked the plate clean. She tried to grab my hair and hold on like cowgirl trying to ride a bull. I picked her up as she wrapped her legs around my neck, and lock her feet across my chest. She pulls my hair, pushing my head back so my tongue will hit her sweet spot. I could feel her muscles tensing and her breathing getting heaving. Her heart beat was pumping so hard I could feel her pulse through her leg, onto my neck. She couldn’t help but to gyrate and rock her hip back and forth on my face, as she let out a high pitched squeak every now and again. I was pleased that I was pleasing her.

I continued until she came and suddenly had an uncontrollable shiver. I laid her on the bed and she released me from her bond. I pulled her thong from around my sore neck, and pulled the covers over us. She laid there out of breath, motionless, and relieved. I chose that time to make my move. She was surprised that I was ready to continue so soon, as I slid myself inside her. She had to dig deep and pull out every ounce of strength she had left, to take what I was giving her, and keep up with me. I took my time though. We started out slow and easy so to give her a chance to recoup some before going all out. Then we began our intense session of heart racing, sweat dripping, heavy breathing, hair pulling, and lust filled sex as I thrust my hips and she rocked and rolled hers until we reached a climax that was so powerful we lost our voices from screaming and grunting so much.

She looked me in my eyes kissed me in a way I had never experienced. I became dizzy, and all of a sudden back in front of the club, and still kissing her. And just like that, it was over. I had forgotten it was a memory of her, with me. And now I remember how she became “the girl from the other night.” She pulled her lips away from mine, then smiled and said “Did that refresh your memory? Now I bet you’ll never forget me again.” I was speechless, and no sooner than when I part my lips to speak, I felt a sharp pain on my finger. I looked down and noticed my cigarette had burnt all the tobacco off and the flame was down to the filter therefore burning my finger. I put it out. When I looked up, she was gone. I can’t say I wasn’t disappointed. Though she was no longer standing there I still answered her question and said “No, I will never forget you.” I still don’t know her name. When I came back inside and apologized for taking so long outside, he looked at me and laughed; saying, “For what?! That was the fastest smoke break you’ve ever taken? Are you finally quitting?” It felt like I was out there for days. When I told him about the woman he laughed again and said “You got that far with her and you don’t even know her?! You of all men never go that far with a woman you don’t even know! She must have been a powerful woman. Who is she?” I told him “I don’t know. She is the girl from the other night.”

The Truth B Told,

B

Last Stand

A woman who has lost custody of her children, and been divorced, all by her husband for disgracing her marriage just as her husband did, finds herself trying to come back to him after being a part for over two years. She feels depressed that she has lost him, and comes to the realization that all of this time she has been pointing the finger at him for everything that went wrong in their marriage and everything that was wrong with her, never thinking of what she might have done wrong. She can’t exactly put her finger on it but she knows that something is not right in her life and that her now ex-husband that she drove away and her children that she lost may be the key to her getting back on track. So she decides that it’s time for one last move, one last stand, and one last attempt to free her life and get back her man. She rushes home to get ready. She takes her time preparing herself, planning out everything from what and how to wear her outfit to the first and last thing she will do and say to him when she finally sees him. She’s being meticulous on purpose, examining her memories of him and what he likes so that she can fit all the right pieces to her outfit together. She takes a bath as not only her treat to herself to relax her but to give her a reason to use her new collection of scented bath oils. Of course she uses two scents, Lavender and Vanilla, which makes his sex drive sky rocket through the roof like a shuttle launch into space. Oh yes, she was planning on being dirty girl. She thinks of him while soaking in the tub, never concerning herself with the time as she planned to visit him in the middle of the night when she knew he was most likely to be home, and the children sound asleep. As she meditates on him, she begins to touch herself, caressing her own body, gently grazing the hairs on her body that make her nervous system send signals to her brain telling her she’s experiencing a tingling sensation. She gets out of the tub to dry off. Laying in the bend on her back, allowing herself to air dry, she continues to try and picture the evening, focusing on what he may look like now. His haircut, his go-tee, his muscles, is his new tattoo the one that he was planning to get when they were married. She continues to get ready. She rubs her lotions and oils, sprays her perfumes, all with matching scents that he loves. She puts her sexy show stopping outfit and her overcoat on, grabs her purse and her keys, and heads over to his place.

I finally arrive at his place and knowing that nobody has ever done to him yet what I'm about to do I realized that I'm not a moment too soon. I'm so apprehensive yet excited that I’m bursting with passion and I start to feel my juices trying to escape my blue thong that I had just bought from Nikki’s Secret especially for this occasion. I also chose Blue because it’s his favorite color. Walking through the front door to his building the bellhop recognizes me, but it seems he has some trouble speaking. I guess it’s kind of hard to speak with your jaw on the ground and your tongue unraveling from your mouth and rolling across the street. I think he could tell what was under my black overcoat... or lack thereof. In fact everyone had the jaw dropping shock and awe syndrome in the lobby, as I walked through. I felt like a Nikki’s Secret super model walking the runway. Riding in the elevator I can't help but wonder if they all knew what I had on under the overcoat, or if they were just surprised to see me, considering I've been out of the picture for a while. Maybe they were just so surprised to see how much of a knockout I've become since they all last saw me. Mmmmm, damn I feel soooo sexy. I made sure I spent all the time necessary to get this body ready, and all the greatest intentions in the world to challenge my new body's stamina and flexibility to the fullest with him tonight. For once I was going to wear his ass out and give him a reason to kill just to get another taste of my sensual seduction. I really couldn't wait to see the expression on his face before I sensually break him down like a drill sergeant to a private, and then after I sexually tear him apart like a cheetah on a gazelle. I heard it to the grapevine that he had a new tat and hoped it was the one he picked out when we were together. He knew that tat was going to get me hot so I'm sure he got it and did so with the thought of teasing me in mind. OMG, I'm so nervous because I want this to be the greatest night of my life and I don't think I can handle seeing him out in town with his gorgeous body, and that sexy tat, and not be able to touch him. Standing at his door I take a deep breath and slowly slide my key in to turn the lock. I'm so glad I kept this key or this evening would not be possible. I open the door and walk in. Shit! Of course he has the alarm system set. That’s the last thing I need is him jumping out of the shadows pointing a gun to my face or pulling one of his wild little Kung Fu moves on me thinking I’m some kind of a perp or something. Fortunately, he never changed the code. As I stare across his loft apartment I can see him laying in his bed sleep and notice he didn’t even flinch. Boy, he’s slipping, or dead tired. Although, that’s never stopped him from popping up like a Ninja before. Wwwwaaaiiitt a sssecond. He couldn’t have possibly been expecting me… could he? If he somehow was alerted… ohh god, I hate it when he does that! I don’t care; I’m not backing down now. It’s too late for that. I’ve worked too hard for this moment and I am getting my family back… tonight! I’ve just gotta do it quietly. My mind and my heart are racing, praying that this goes well. I’m hoping that his hardwood floors don’t creek, or his bed for that matter. Hmm, probably shouldn’t have worn Stilettos’ then. Last thing I want is to wake up the kids.

Wow, I love what he’s done to the place. He always did have a talent for interior decorating. Damn he’s got good taste. As I stand next to his bed and I watch him sleep so peacefully, pondering how I shall wake him up, I fall in love with him all over again. With feelings and emotions overwhelming me I wanted to cry tears of joy/pain because my children and I are attached a wonderful but yet I may have lost him for good. I still smile because I know I still have a fighting chance tonight. I pulled out my can this new product I found called Body Tag by Nikki’s Secret. Apparently, they draw a sample of your pheromones from your body and mix it with a fragrance of your choosing. Put it in an aerosol can, and you got Body Tag. You’re supposed to spray it on your partner that you’re intimate with so when you leave they have your scent and your favorite fragrance to remember you by. It helps when you’re out of town for a while and want them to have something to remember you by, or you wanna keep those pesky sluts off your man when you’re not around. I’m using it to hopefully wake him up… if it actually works. As I’m spraying him, of course one of my children comes downstairs, probably for a glass of water. My child sees me, and says “Mommy?” I hold my finger to my lip to signal to my child to be quiet. I then wave hi and whisper to go back to bed. Thank God my children listen. Just as my child walks out of my view and I close my eyes, slowly exhaling from relief of getting through that without a sound, I suddenly feel something cold reaching under my overcoat… and then… I hear… a click. OMG, fuck my life. Piss or blood, I do not wanna get this outfit wet with anything I haven’t already. I turn my head back to my ex and open my eyes and he is laying there staring at me sideways with his gun up my hoo-hoo! This has got to be the quickest way to make a woman’s Vajay-jay go from wet to dry in 0.6 seconds.

The lights come on. Ok so now I’m terrified and the only thing that could come to mind for me to say is “Hi baby”. He replies “What are you doing here Lexi?” I didn’t know what to say so I just went for it. I laid him down and straddled his perfect body. I was right, not only does he have the tat, but his body looks like it was sculpted and chiseled by a female professional artist with a fetish for bodybuilders. I was drooling so hard like a wolf salivating as it stalks its prey. I was so ready to take him on… all of him. He already had his white dress shirt un-tucked and unbuttoned, so I didn’t have to do much. Now I just needed to get him out of his pants. I pulled his shirt off of his shoulders, and he sits up asks me “What are doing Lexi?” “Isn’t it obvious?” I said. I untie the belt on my overcoat and I slowly open it. There goes that jaw dropping shock and awe affect again. I love it when that happens. Placed my right hand on his cheek and told him that “tonight your love slave”. I began to make peace with him by telling him “I am sorry for what I have done to you, and I realize that I messed up bad. I never showed you the love you deserved. I didn’t show you respect, I didn’t listen to you, and I didn’t trust you. That was not fair of me. I know that now, and I wanna make up for it. You did make mistakes too, but I was worse because I know you never meant to hurt to hurt me. You were only trying to find what I didn’t give you. I was trying my best to hurt you in the worse way. OMG, you had me so angry, I wanted to kill you, but I didn’t have it in me to do it. You had every right to leave. I have become a new woman and I would like to earn my family back if you will have me. I want to be with you… tonight. Let me show you how I feel. Reconnect with me; give me a chance to make it right”.

I gazed into his eyes as he looked into mine. He wiped away the tears that I fought so hard to hold back. I’m so scared that I’m practically trembling in fear of what he is going to say. Heart’s racing again, adrenaline’s pumping, and the tears won’t stop. God I must look so desperate and pathetic to him right now. This is not turning out how I planned. I need to pull it together, show him I am strong and that I have some self-control. I stared into his eyes hoping that he could hear my thoughts. He tried to look away, but I wouldn’t let him. He struggled to respond but finally he spoke and said the words I never thought I would hear again from him, “I’m sorry but it’s over. I love you and always will, and of course I forgive you, but I just can’t take the chance of you hurting me again. Last time, you took everything from me and I almost died. I have peace now and I’ve worked too hard to risk losing it now. I’m sorry”. It was the worst feeling I had ever felt in my life. My heart had been crushed, only it was by my own doing. There was nothing more I could do except to walk out. So I closed my overcoat, tied it up and took my walk of shame out the door. I had to look back and see him one last time and I watched him as he had his face buried in his hands as if he felt like he made the worst decision. At least that what I was hoping so he would maybe call me back, but I believe that I just hurt him all over again by even coming over here and putting him in this difficult position. He never did like to upset me. So as I crouch down in front of his door outside of his loft I come to the conclusion that I really am the cause of all of this. I destroyed a perfectly good family and when I tried to follow what I learned from him and make it right, I got back what I gave to him all this time… rejection. This is my failure. This was my Last Stand.

The Truth B Told,

B

Relationships Part Duex

What is it with us and relationships? One minute we are with someone, and the next minute we're not. We just jump in and walk or run or swim out depending on the situational circumstances. Some of us do it because we're lonley and need attention, some because we get bored, and some because we just are never happy with what we have. All of those different yet similar complexes have one thing in common for sure. They can't seem to just settle on a permanent decision so they run around the world looking, searching, scouring for that next potential quick fix like you get from a drug or like a sugar rush you get from a bag a skittles or pixie stix. Here's the problem. We do these things and find ourselves never being fullfilled with the happiness we've been searching for. Why is this, you might be asking? Well... there are a number of reasons for this. Because deep down inside we do want something permanent but feel as if it may never come. Its a self-esteem issue. When you have been out there searching and searching for the right one and you keep finding the wrong one, then that can hurt your self-esteem and make you feel vulnerable... like a failure. If it happens too many times then you begin feeling that your not worth it and/or that the right person is not out there for you. So then you just make yourself available to anyone that can catch your interest enough to make you decide to just say the hell with the rules, the hell with your morals, just through out all the stops and go all the way with this person. Some will just choose the opposite and begin to despize the opposite sex entirely. This type of person will go to all the public places that everyone who feels young, grown and sexy (or wants to be made to feel grown and sexy), horny, or just loves partying any way they can, and they sit at the bar drinking, or in a lounge chair reading a book and ignoring everyone around them. If they approach you, you shoo them away with the cold shoulder, or maybe you make them feel small and as if they couldn't even begin to fantasize about living up to your standards. Your friends are the only one's that you will conversate within a place like that. Sometimes they are the reason you are even there. They are trying to assist you in living a better life but its hard for you to break out of your shell and you just don't feel like they get that. However, they are working hard doing the best they can to help you find the happiness your looking for. And they don't feel like YOU get that. Some will stay at home and just avoid the issue all together and stay at the computer chatting it up on facebook and updating their status about how nobody loves them. Then you will watch movies and text your bff or your boy and trash talk the opposite sex and listen to useless advice that is usually given by the one friend who has no relationship as well, is usually less attractive than you, always angry (especially at the opposite sex) and feels they know everything there is to know about sex, relationships, all sexual orientations, and men and women, and so therefore they know to themselves, for sure that its not worth it to ever even get involved in another relationship again. They will make you believe that you should have one night stands and just use the opposite sex so you get what you want and the other party gets nothing that they want. Then they just may question or critisize you when you do those things because you didn't do exactly what they thought you should've done or they just decided to change the rules on you for that specific day and situation, but they really just have no clue and refuse to admit it. They are miserable as misery loves company but doesn't want anybody to be better or happier than them. Its a sad situation. So how do we remedy this entire situation? Well... first off, you need to understand that relationships, much like marriage require two main important elements. Patience and kindness. These are the pillars that hold everything else together. This is where you will start... patience. "Good things come to those who wait", is a quote that is known, often spoken, and often heard by many people in this world. Unfortunately many people say things that make sense but they don't know what it means. This is one of those statements. We all would like to think we know a thing or two about patience. Do you know the proper formula to follow from single to married? Strangers- you've already completed this step because you don't know each other. Acquaintance- you notice each others presence, somehow you become knowledgeable of each others names and then have an intelligent conversation and are not yet friend but rather acquaintances. Next is Friends- you have chatted often and maybe even hung out a few times and find that the other is a decent person you could relate to, and call upon to go do something fun and when you need a friend more than anything else. Yes it is very possible to have friends of the opposite sex and there be nothing sexually intimate between you two. Neither one of you has too bee unacttractive or very attractive for this to work. Commited Partners- Otherwise known as Boyfriend and Girlfriend. Well... I'm sure I don't have to spell it out for you. However, in the interest making things clear, I will say this, the two of you are now in a commited relationship. That's it, committed. Sex is a luxury not a privaledge. You should be so fortunate that you have made it this far with each other. You are not yet united as one but rather you are a team as well as individuals with your own lives. Meaning they control their own lives and you control yours. Their business is their business and yours is yours. This is also a stage of which you are both more comfortable with each other and can relax. Don't get too comfortable with each other and forget to put the joint effort into making the relationship not only work but last. Think of it as a crank radio. You know, one of those radios that you have in a disaster kit that you have to crank a thousand times before it has enough power to last for a little while. That's a lot of cranking and turning.  Your muscles get tired and your ready to give up because its such hard work. But you remember that the emergency radio can make life so much better for you, and you have it because you appreciate what it has to offer, know that's what you have been looking for and its what you need. So you have to work to make it work. Now if you can maintain this behavior for at least two year's, then it is ok to start thinking about the possibilities of marriage. Engagement- You are now taking the next leap in preparation for the biggest leap you will ever take. You have the nice engagement rings, your introducing each other as your fiancée, and making wedding and honeymoon plans. It is the best time of your life, to date, so far. Your responsibilities are the same but they have enhanced and so has the importance for you to fulfill them. This is also the time to show your future life partner that you can handle being a part of this marriage, being united as one, and being responsible. You should take this time to seek marriage counseling. Preferably by your minister of whatever your religion is. This is not to be viewed as a bad thing but as an extra level of assistance with growing stronger and better understanding each other. With your counselor you should take the time to finish out the last chapter in your book of who you were and what you did before you met each other. Allow your counselor to help you explain your story to your partner so that they can understand you and you can become closer. This is necessary before your wedding day so that there are no surprises. Also keep in mind that whatever happened in the past is in the past. You want to be cautious because you can't just overlook everything but if you take your time and follow the formula then you will know enough about your partner to be able to determine whether or not its something to worry about or if its a deal breaker. Always remember people can change and everybody deserves a second chance.

The Truth B Told

                B